Toasty hot in the Costa Blanca

Relaxing-ish holiday so far – if you set aside the niggly way in which close family members can rub each other up the wrong way…

First 12 days were spent with the funny lads – Lewis and Evan. Carrie (Lewis’ girlfriend) made us up to 5. Hilarious time. Boozing and sunbathing and eating mainly. And laughing. Bastards caught me out every time at the tolls on the Auto Pisto de Meditteraneo. Singing some concoction from Flight of the Concords. And getting me flummoxed as I tried out my piss poor Spanish… De nada. De nada.

I am now onto the last leg. The bit with the ghastly combo: Rebel Eldest (who is clearly not out of her teens); the two weenies and my maw n paw.

So far Meg has burnt her boob. Jamie has annoyed us all. Ana has decided to become a boy and is welded into her Spain football strip – she wants to be Casillas. Paw has disgraced himself by getting unco fu’ on import Whisky brewed in Glasgow. And Maw has found a new career – producing sound effects – specialising in Hysteria and Hysterical Meltdown. That last one is something to behold – and was triggered by Paw falling out of bed during ‘his disgrace’.

Me? Well… I am totally perfect of course…

Back on the 24th July. When I have lots and lots of stories to tell…!